Who-I-Am: How Personal Stories Build Professional Trust

Quote of the week

“Authenticity is the daily practice of letting go of who we think we're supposed to be and embracing who we are.” Brené Brown

Have you ever found yourself in a situation where your resume looked perfect on paper, but you struggled to connect with the people you needed to influence? Perhaps you're the new manager trying to earn your team's respect, or the consultant who needs clients to trust your recommendations, or the job candidate who interviews well technically but can't seem to build rapport.

I experienced this firsthand when I joined a cross-functional team as the facilitator. Despite my credentials, I could sense the skepticism in the room. It wasn't until I shared the story of how I messed up a business partnership through a disastrous handling of feedback that the dynamic shifted. Suddenly, I wasn't just the consultant with impressive qualifications. I was someone who understood their struggles.

When Credentials Aren't Enough

In earlier newsletters we talked of what Aristotle spoken of as ethos—credibility. As storytelling expert Annette Simmons explains in her framework of business stories, "Who-I-Am" stories help others understand the events that shaped us, our view of ourselves, and what motivates us. These aren't just personal anecdotes. They're strategic tools for building the trust that competence alone cannot create.

Too often, we try to establish credibility through achievements and expertise. But achievements tell people what we've done, not who we are. And in business, people need to trust the person behind the performance before they'll fully commit to following, buying from, or working with us.

The Three Elements of Effective Who-I-Am Stories

The Defining Moment Share a specific experience that shaped your perspective or values. This isn't your life story - it's the moment that explains why you approach your work the way you do. The key is choosing a moment that reveals something meaningful about your character while remaining professionally relevant.

The Vulnerability Factor As Simmons suggests, these stories work because they demonstrate the qualities that make you stand out while building trust in your competence or character. The most powerful Who-I-Am stories include a moment of uncertainty, failure, or learning that shows you're human.

The Professional Connection Bridge your personal experience to your professional approach. How did this defining moment influence the way you lead, solve problems, or serve others? This connection helps your audience understand not just who you are, but why that matters to them.

Video

This week, we analyze Oprah Winfrey's 2018 Golden Globe speech. Notice how she weaves personal experiences from her childhood into a powerful message about speaking truth to power, using her own journey to establish credibility and connection with her audience.

Watch how Oprah uses specific moments from her past - watching Sidney Poitier win an Oscar as a child, her experiences as a young journalist - to establish not just her credentials but her authentic connection to the issues she's addressing. Her personal stories don't overshadow her message; they strengthen it by showing the experiences that shaped her perspective.

As you prepare for your next important conversation, remember: people need to know who you are before they'll trust what you can do. Your Who-I-Am story isn't self-indulgence—it's strategic authenticity that builds the foundation for every relationship that matters.

This newsletter was inspired by Annette Simmons' framework of business storytelling and the concept of "Who-I-Am Stories" as tools for building trust and credibility.